How To Create Feelings Of Admiration And Respect For Your Spouse

images“What an amazing write up”. Jane’s eyes lit up with excitement. I was really inspired. You are a genius. I’m not sure of that, I have a long way to go. Oh sweetheart, you underestimate yourself. You are so good at it. I have read so many write ups and I can’t tell when I come across a good one. I am so proud of you.

Jane always complimented Chris before they got married. However, after they got married, this started to change. The compliments started to dwindle. This is often the case in so many marriages. Like Jane and Chris, couples start off on a high note and eventually the pressures of life hit them and they lose steam of the things that bond a couple together. There is still hope though, these feelings can be recaptured. Here are some tips that can help:

Discover those things that can build and destroy your feelings of admiration and respect for your spouse: You may start by making a list for each category. You may focus on areas such as affection, finances, truthfulness, conversation, commitment.

Show it to your spouse: Both of you should take time and go through it. Look out for areas of improvement and agree to overcome the things that destroy your admiration for each other.
Focus on changing your habits and not your traits: Try to change the way you think about your spouse. Do not dwell on his personality but on his actions bearing in mind that specific habits can be changed.

Adapt new habits: You may start by defining which habits you desire and then plan a strategy for developing that habit. Give enough time to learn this new habit and evaluate it after. Bear in mind that there might be some setbacks. The virtues of patience and optimism are very crucial to this task. Don’t forget to voice it out.

Written by Dr. Godwin & Blessing Ude.

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