Fathers, your children need your discipline.

“He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him”. (Proverbs 13:24)

 

It is very important that husbands and wives learn to work together when disciplining their children. Here are some guidelines:

 

Be consistent: Children need to understand the differences between appropriate and inappropriate behaviors.  Parents do not usually see a particular behavior as wrong except it gets to the extreme or makes them uncomfortable in inconsistent disciplining. It’s expedient that when parents make rules, they stick to them.

 

Apply appropriate discipline: Corporal and non-corporal punishments should be used wisely to help instead of hurting a child.  Most parents take away privileges: this should be carried out with caution bearing in mind that a child’s basic right is a no go area. Wisely considered rewards are a good way to appropriate discipline. This often works to encourage children to change their behavior.

 

Be in agreement with your wife: Amos 3:3 says that “Can two work together except they agree?” Training a child is a joint effort between spouses. Sometimes children can perceive the discord between mum and dad and use that to their advantage.  A joint opinion attracts greater respect from children and carries more weight with them. Children are less likely to challenge a decision when they know that their parents made it together. Some children usually manipulate the parent that favors them.

 

Make the rules simple: It’s important that children understand why they should or should not do something. Telling a child “Because I said so” is not good enough. The child may do as asked but the purpose for the discipline is not met. It’s important to clearly communicate our ethical, moral and personal values to our children.

 

Manage your anger properly: Fathers are encouraged to control their anger before disciplining their children.  We need to separate our emotions from the disciplinary action and not use it as a means of communicating displeasure.

Written by Dr. Godwin & Blessing Ude

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